Men R fthe Underworld & Women R fRandom Villages
by Phoenixzsar
Summary: Naraku and Kikyou are stuck in a rut, so they seek out the help of Kikyo's sister Kaede who is now a marriage counselor for help. KikNar pairing. Pls ignore Kikyo spelling will correct starting ch.2. Sexual undertones only.


Men are from the Underworld and Women are from Random Villages.

**This story was inspired by late night conversation with Alotika, we were rambling about random things and we started talking about favorite pairings and I somehow managed to conclude that marriage changes people, even evil villains and powerful priestesses. So this story came about, it is dedicated to her and to anyone who loves the pairing. I am only merely trying to convince her that this pairing belongs together; she may or may not disagree after reading this. Btw, I have never written a story for Inuyasha and this is the beginning of 3 chapters. Also she & her sister came up with the names of their offspring. This is my second fanfic as of yet.**

**I don't own any of the characters.**

"How many times do I have to ask you to help me around the house, Naraku?" Kikyo asked exasperatedly at the man standing before her. He stood in the doorway of the wooden hut and was calmly looking outside, observing the children playing in the front yard. _There she goes again!_ He sighed. _I can't stand still for one moment without her jumping on my tail; I am not Inuyasha, sheesh! I don't even resemble the ugly creature!_

"Are you even listening to me? I have been talking to you for about ten minutes and you haven't responded!" Her feet were tired, swollen and her back hurt…being married, having kids and tending to the house was much harder than fighting demons that was for sure. Oh, how she longed for the days when she freely roamed the country side, searching for that puppy, named Inuyasha. _Now he was a good looking stud! _She had given up on the man-pup when she realized that she had feelings for this other idiot that she married. She was now having second thoughts. Remembering how the first couple of months were incredibly passionate and they couldn't keep their hands off each other, it made her blush. Then several kids came along and slowly, this barrier was created between them and they had barely any time for each other. It seemed that they had more positive communication back when they were enemies. She had tried very hard to give him everything that a wife should give, but really, a little help wouldn't hurt!

Naraku slowly turned his head and looked at her as if confused. "Huh? Did you say something?" Kikyo felt the beginning of a nervous tick pulsating near her eye. "I asked you to please take the children to the river and make sure they take their bath before dinner!" She mentally shot an arrow at his rear and wondered if she really did do that if it would get him going. She wanted to be done with dinner and head to bed; it had been a very long day indeed. "Oh and honey poo? Make sure that when the kids bathe, you bathe, too okay?"

He definitely detected a hint of sarcasm with his new nickname. He wondered why she didn't call him the old nicknames that she had made up during their most passionate nights. _I liked being called sexy demon from down under. _The thought made him smirk; _maybe I can get her to call me that again tonight._ Finding his new motivation, he suddenly rushed out of the house, picked up the three silly kids in his arms and ran to the river.

_Maybe I should shoot more mental arrows,_ Kikyo thought, surprised at her husband's sudden urgency. She knew that she had to do something, he always got on her nerves and he always ignored her whenever she went on a rant that lasted for hours. _How the heck did I get like this? I used to be nice and sweet and patient and…and-oh who am I kidding! I can't even stand myself anymore! _She hated to admit it but her last resort was turning to her little sister Kaede for advice. Since retiring from fighting demons, her sister had found a new passion in marriage counseling. She thought it an odd job for her but it seemed to make her and the couples that she helped happy. Kikyo didn't know how her husband would react to the idea, she was sure that he would reject it but she was willing to suggest it. It was either that or he would have to find a new wooden hut to live in. She sighed.

XX

Naraku hurriedly washed the kids and himself. He kept fantasying about the night that he would yet to have with Kikyo, _she won't know what hit her! _"Daad! You kee- washin-my mou-!" Naraku snapped back into attention and quickly pulled the rag away from his son's face. "Oh, sorry son, I got a little distracted. Here, take the rag and you do it okay?"

"That's what I've been trying to tell you but you are spacing out again! Sheesh!" A deep blush appeared on his face and was a little embarrassed that he had practically brushed his son's teeth with the wash rag. _How did we get like this? I love her and the children she has given me, but she always seemed so preoccupied with everything else that she just forgot about me. How can I make her see that I still care and love her? I get more out of my fantasies than real life. I can't do anything right in her eyes anymore. She complains about it all the time that sometimes, I just don't want to hear her voice. But she just looks so adorable when her lips are moving and I can't hear anything coming out of them!_

"DAAAd! You are doing it again!" Little Naraku looked at his father with a concerned look on his face; the little boy also felt a little nervous tick forming near his eye.

"Oh! Sorry little Naraku! We should hurry so we won't worry our dear priestess, no?"

"Daddy, I am done, too!" Naraku turned to look at the little girl that yelled to her dad with a big smile on her face, her small arms waving. "Good, Naomi! Where's your big brother, Kiraku?"

A big splash behind him made him jump and grasp his chest with this left hand, he was sure his heart almost jumped out. "Aaaaah! Kiraku! Don't do that! You scared me half to death! Not that I want to go there again!"

"Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha! Sorry dad, but I couldn't help myself!" The eldest boy was holding his stomach due to his ensuing laughter. The others followed behind. "Daddy, you are funny!" The little girl shouted, whilst also holding her stomach from laughter.

"Yes, I suppose your daddy is a very funny man!" Oh, how far away were the days of his manipulative and evil schemes and the cowering of people and demons before him.

"Okay, let us go now." He sighed.

"Aaaawww, but, I don't waaannna," whined little Naraku.

"Now, now little Naraku, remember how your mother gets if we take too long in the bath," he reminded him. With a start, the little boy rushed toward the bank of the river to prevent the wrath of Kikyo. "Maybe if we hurry, we might have story time tonight." The little offspring shouted happily.

XX

After dinner, clean up and story time, Kikyo and Naraku headed to bed. Kikyo more tired than anything plopped herself on the futon without drawing the soft sheets. _Oh, thank the gods of mercy and futons! Finally! Sleep here I come! _ She felt rugged hands beginning to rub her back and it made her eyes pop open, _now what?_ "Err, what are you doing?"

"Oh, hey there my most lovely priestess of all the lands, I was sort of hoping that...uh…you…and… uh, me…could, you know?" He was unsure as to how and why his voice got higher toward the end of that question, was that even a means of persuasion?

"Most lovely what?" She slowly turned to look at him, "Look at me! I am tired, my hair is a mess, I haven't showered and I am not really in the mood to spread the love, okay?"

Naraku's mood was shattered and he was frozen on the spot. _Aaaalrighty then, well, so much for a little love and tenderness._ He decided to finally talk to her about this, it was getting too much for either of them, he could tell by the way she acted and he couldn't help rebelling back.

"Listen, Kikyo? I have been thinking that nothing is right between us anymore." The man sat next to the woman and held his head down, as if defeated. "I am not sure, where this is going now. You are not happy and neither am I."

For the first time in a long time, Kikyo found herself pleasantly surprised by her husband. She rose from her position and sat next to him. "I agree Naraku; things have not been well between us for a long time, funny that you should bring it up, but I was thinking the very same thing today."

"You were? Well, how could you not? You are always angry with me."

"I am not always angry with you Naraku," she said loudly, which made her quickly hush her voice when she realized that she was almost yelling, "it's just that, well, I can't stand you sometimes…you get on my nerves and I want to kick you!"

"Eh? Kick me?" Naraku sounded surprised and he felt a little hurt by her words.

"Well, yes…not because I hate you but because I just feel trapped. I know that I have become this person that even I, can't recognize! And you! You used to be strong willed and you were always the man of action! I mean, you brought a whole army of demons to their knees and I just see you differently now because I feel like you don't like your life, that you want to run away and leave me with all the responsibility."

"Kikyo! That is not fair! I help whenever I can I still go fight demons, I hunt for our food, I am just not as talented as you with child rearing and cleaning and cooking and washing and-and well, I think you may be right. I think we both have taken advantage of each other."

Kikyo gently put a hand on his shoulder, "Honey, maybe we should go see my sister? She is a marriage counselor now and I think she could help us?"

"Wha-? No, I don't want to air our dirty kimonos out there for everyone to judge and possibly laugh at what we have become! Especially me! What would all the demons think, that stupid dog friend of yours, that goofy priest and _everyone?_" Naraku suddenly had paranoia plastered all over his face.

"Really? You really care what the guys think of you?" Kikyo crossed her arms, a little annoyed at the childish man in before her.

"Heh, heh! Oh, no honey, I am not really interested in what they think, ha, ha!" He looked at his wife, suddenly turning serious. She still managed to look beautiful, even with the random stray hairs crowning her face and the small bags under her eyes. She returned his gaze with a glare.

"Oh, alright! Let's go see your sister!" She reached forward and kissed him.


End file.
